EPISODE 6 - THE SELF SABOTAGING HABITS THAT ARE KILLING YOUR BUSINESS

EPISODE SUMMARY

00:02:17 – Hickory Smoked Red Wine Truffle & Basil Pizza
00:07:49 – Your goal in business
00:09:08 – The moron scale and what’s your score?
00:15:05 – We are all morons to a certain degree
00:17:00 – Your Self sabotaging habits & personal branding
00:20:35 – Your personal brand applied online and offline
00:22:29 – Facing the mirror and creating the best version of yourself
00:24:03 – Removing the masks and coming clean to your self-sabotaging traits
00:31:05 – Common Self-sabotaging traits
00:42:16 – The NEW best version of yourself

SUPPORTING EPISODES

EPISODE TRANSCRIPT

Intro – Welcome to the BBQ, Bourbon and Business Podcast Show. Smokin’ hot, full proof life and business strategies made fun. Learn to make time your friend and build a business while enjoying the things you love. No bollocks just straight to the core advice from the real world. Please join your hosts Luke and Helena.


H – Hello everyone and welcome to the BBQ, bourbon and business podcast show my name is Helena and joining me is my very good friend and business partner Luke. Hi Luke.


L – Good evening everyone. Welcome again. It’s great to have you here.


H – Building a business should be fun. So in between sampling some good bourbons and sharing a few backyard BBQ tips, we will be sharing practical, no-nonsense strategies to help stop trading time for money, turn your business into a valuable asset and build a smart business engine that gives you the freedom to enjoy the things you love.


Things like sippin’ on a good bourbon and a lo’ n slow BBQ with friends and family.


In the last episode, we discussed the 7 sequential steps every business must take to not just build a successful business but also a valuable one. Everything in life has a sequence and building a business is no different.


If you missed the last episode, click back through and listen to it because these steps have shaped the lives of so many business owners on a personal and professional level. We loved sharing them with everyone.


If you want to know more about the 7 steps we cover them more in-depth in the FREE online business training workshop – 7 Steps: Build a Smart Business Engine to Give you Time and Money Freedom.


In this episode, we are going to be focusing on the very first step which is optimising your mindset and specifically looking at your personal brand.


100% of the time you are your business. It doesn’t matter if you are just selling a product or a service, you as the business owner, represent your business. Tonight, we are going to measure your moron score.


But before we begin let’s do our favourite part of the night and pour ourselves a drink.


Our new Bourbon of the Month is Eagle Rare 10 Year Kentucky Straight Bourbon. We had a little bit of a chat about this one and why we love it so much in the last episode so check it out.


How are you enjoying your bourbon their Luke?



L – Fantastic as always.


H – Did you cook anything special on the weber this weekend?

 

(00:02:17 – Hickory Smoked Red Wine Truffle & Basil Pizza)

L – I sure did and I think our BBQ fans will love this.


So I’m a Weber kettle fan. I’m not a BBQ expert but I’ll try to pretend to be one. What I cook regularly are wood-smoked pizzas. Just on a weber kettle so no fancy equipment.


So this weekend I cooked Hickory Smoked Red Wine Truffle Salami & Basil pizzas.


So now that sounds really fancy but it’s very easy to make.


So what you do is simply go buy a base, I don’t make my bases, you get your favourite base. Make sure you got a nicely seasoned pizza sauce. Seasoning is key you get some very bland stuff.


So that’s your base right.


Then what you do is you put pizza cheese from the supermarket nothing fancy. Then you just go to your deli and if you can get red wine truffle salami it is absolutely amazing.


You simply put the cheese first, ’cause often you get asked to put the cheese on top from again everyone can do whatever the hell they want but I prefer a bit of cheese on the bottom. Here’s a tip I find that if you go nuts on the cheese the pizzas become very soggy.


My family likes crispy pizzas on the weber so I get a thin base. Put a smaller layer of cheese, truffle salami on and you put little bits of basil paste around.


This is like a little secret I think ’cause so many people when I see them making pizza don’t do this. Again, it’s seasoning. So a good sprinkle of black pepper and white pepper. White pepper is fragrant and black paper is more tasty. The combination really makes a beautiful flavour and you need salt off course.


Then the coals in your chimney must be at full. This is a hot hot cook.
The coals are indirect. If you have a small weber you might want to put a small basket on the side. You don’t put the coals directly under the pizza or you’ll burn the base. So your cooking indirect.


What you want to do is you want to make the coals and you want to get really really hot first. And then you quickly open it and put your pizza on. Chuck a small handful of Hickory chips, not too much because pizza is delicate.


Then I cook it for bed 5 to 6 minutes on one side. I open the lid and I’ll spin it 90 degrees and cook the other side. Depending on the weber end how hot it is generally my pizzas are cooked anywhere between 7 to 12 minutes in total.


H – Do you use a pizza stone or go directly on the grill.


L- I go straight on the grill. Pizza stone yeah, some people do it I’ve never got the pizza stone formula right. I just like it directly on the grill and I like a little bit of burnt crisps underneath from the flames. But yeah, lots of people cook on stone. So, give it ago the main thing is the smoke and it’s a lot of fun.


H- We’ll pop the receipt up on our website bbqbourbonbusiness.com for anyone who wants to try it out. And don’t forget to upload it to social media and tag us @bbqbourbonbusiness We’d love to see what you are all cooking and drinking.


Please join us now, pour yourself a drink and sit back, relax and enjoy and let’s talk about this episode the moron scale.

 

(00:07:49 – Your goal in business)

L – Ok, so this episode we are going to have a lot of fun. There’s going to be some good laughs. It’s a humours topic but there is a very serious component to this.


In the last episode, we talked about sequencing and building a business. You should be building a business that does the work for you. A smart engine so that you can genuinely stop trading time for money. This should be a goal in your business not just only trying to make money.


You should also have a goal of building your business into a valuable asset. You’re working five, ten, fifteen years in your business and you don’t want to get to the end of it and think “well what is this business worth?”. Only to find out it’s worth a fraction of what you thought because you haven’t done the right things of creating value throughout the period of owning your business.


This is where the seven steps come in. This is really what the philosophy of this whole podcast is all about. Building a business engine to help you do the right things.


So today is all about Step 1 – Optimising your mindset.


Now mindset is one of those things people embrace or run and hide in the cupboard. This is where the moron scale and what’s your score comes in.

 

(00:09:08 – The moron scale and what’s your score?)

Let’s discuss what I mean by a moron – it is someone who does something in public to annoy other people BUT they are completely oblivious to the fact they are annoying, they have no idea because they are so self-absorbed in their own world.


Here are some examples:


1. The shopping cart moron – The person in a shopping isle with their shopping cart full parked sideways blocking the aisle and they are talking on their phone. When you eventually tell to please get out the way they look at you with a death stare like it’s your fault. They get at least a nine out of ten on the moron scale.


2. The traffic light moron – You are at the traffic lights and the red light is transitioning to the green bulb and the green is just starting to come to life and the moron behind you blasts their horn so loud and hard you fly through your front window – that’s at least a seven out of ten


3. The talking in a cinema moron – You’re sitting there romantically with your partner trying to watch a movie and the clown behind you is yakking loudly. You’re in the cinema thinking “Who the hell does this?” Well, that’s what the moron does.


4. Can’t decide what I want takeaway moron – It’s Friday night. You’ve had a hard week. The kids are screaming for dinner. And you go into the KFC or McDonalds and there’s a queue from hell. And everyone is waiting in and irritable and they want to get home. And the guy at the front, after 20 minutes in the queue, still can’t decide what he wants. That’s another moron.


So what’s the point of this? Moron traits leads to a personal brand – we all have personal brands -what other people really think of us.


This is what happens when you get branded by the people around you in business.


So you have a cousin Dwayne, Uncle Bob and Aunty Sybil. They are branded as the “Oh no, no that family.” Everyone has this lot in their family.


Dwayne is 47 lives at home, collects dead insects. Aunty Cybil says Dwyane is still finding what is right for him, she doesn’t want to push him in case he makes a wrong career move.


They come to family BBQ, the dog starts to howl and hides in the fridge and the grannies hide the good crockery cause this lot doesn’t know how to use them and will smash them. There are more than 2 plates at the setting, 5 utensils, soup spoon, dessert spoon, butter knife, steak knife etc and cousin Dwayne thinks this is a multiple-choice competition and he has to win a prize and tell his insects. And Aunty Cybil and Bob eat in turns as they only have one pair of teeth.


This family due to their traits have been branded by others as the moron family. Everyone has this family that when they come over you dive for cover.

 

(00:15:05 – We are all morons to a certain degree)

All of us are morons to a certain degree, and we all have a moron scale reading. Most of us just don’t know it, until our moron traits are brought to our attention. But even then, some of us don’t get it and usually the ones who either can’t see their moron traits or deny them, well they have the higher moron scores – like cousin Dwayne.


Now, what does this have to do with business – well everything.


People buy you first (your image) – your product and service second.


Focus on business strategies but there is you and depending on what you read on the moron scale, depends on how successful you will be in business.


So, if you have a high moron reading – what is going to happen? You are going to damage your personal brand and sabotage your business

It’s your personal brand and if you do things that annoy people they are going to think – I’m not going to buy from that idiot. He’s incompetent or always late, unreliable, definitely not trustworthy. Or you’re not congruent with your message.


H – Like your selling healthcare and wellbeing products but you’re overweight.


L – Yeah if you rock up with your stomach in a wheelbarrow people aren’t going to believe you.


Or your selling stock and you rock up in your car that has a missing wheel and the doors are falling off. That is not a congruent message. People are not going to believe you and start negatively branding you.

 

(00:17:00 – Self sabotaging habits & personal branding)

And in my first business mine was my ego and this is what I call a self sabotaging habits.


In my first business, because I had such a big ego as a kid and so much success, I thought I knew everything. I really could say I learnt a lot about business and was skilled in some aspects and a disaster in others. As a result, my personal branding was a disaster.


My ego destroyed that business. It had nothing to do with my business strategies. It was me and my personal branding and myself sabotaging habits that actually wrecked it.


H – I just want to add to that. If you’re young, and you make these social gaffs, you’re still learning about life. It’s kind of excusable but you are still a detriment to yourself. But if you’ve been a business owner for a very long time and you are still not self-aware. You’re an adult and a business owner you should be aware of what your personal brand is right now. But some people aren’t and there are still some things that you have not picked up on. Which we are going to cover moving forward.


L – Well this is the thing. A lot of people don’t. The people who resist this the most, like self-development, are afraid. That’s the truth. But they won’t listen. They don’t take criticism.


Every single person has a personal brand. And it’s how the world sees us. Usually, our perception of our personal brand is very different to how other’s see us. Most people think they are marvellous. But that’s not really the truth.


People start to form an impression of you within 3 seconds of meeting you. Even before 3 minutes, they have cemented in their head if they like you or not. After 5 minutes they have personally branded you based on how you showed up. And you haven’t even started talking about the business yet. You haven’t even said, “Hello, how’s your grannie.” Nothing.


This vision that you are reflecting is now cast in their mind. Why this is so dangerous in business is because it’s human nature. If you’ve made a decision that is congruent to your body, you’ve made a decision based on your beliefs and values and blah blah blah, and someone decides you’re a moron it doesn’t matter now how fancy your sales pitch is or how good the product or service is because they’ve decided in the back of their mind that you’re a clown and a moron.

 

(00:20:35 – Your personal brand applied online and offline)

That’s self sabotaging and it’s dangerous in business. And this applies online and offline. Yes online – this is probably news to a lot of you but your online presence is your personal brand.


Wonder why your internet marketing sucks or your website makes no money. You can do those strategies to death for digital marketing and new logos and product prices and specials and if your business is struggling take look at your personal brand and your moron scale reading.


H – We talk about branding a lot and we talk about social media and how you perceive yourself. There is a side of pretending to be someone for your business and there’s being yourself. But if yourself is a detriment to your business then you need to have a look at those traits that might be affecting you. Your right Luke no matter how fancy your sales pitch you end up having to end up clawing your way back to a position where they might buy. That’s a big thing for people that they don’t realise, and it doesn’t matter how friendly you or are how good your product is they’ve already made an impression in their mind.


And that goes for social media as well. If you are meeting with someone they’ve already checked you out online. They’ve already gone to your LinkedIn. So, think about how you are representing yourself online and offline because someone has already checked you out before you’ve even met with them.


L- 100% People scope you out and brand you before they’ve even spoken to you.

 

(00:22:29 – Facing the mirror and creating the best version of yourself)

You want to create the best version of yourself – your personal branding to be successful.



One that appeals to your customers, not chase them away. You must create a personal brand that reflected your best qualities, your talents and your natural gifts you have to offer the world.


How do you do this? Theirs 3 techniques that we teach.


1. Facing the mirror
2. Coming Clean
3. Your NEW Best Version


1. Facing the mirror


Here’s a little exercise. And you might want to pause this if you’re listening to the podcast or watching on YouTube. Do this little task and I promise you this will change your life. We’ve seen this happen for 100s of people.


Task Number 1 – Your personal brand. Write down a little paragraph, just a few lines about what people would say about you behind closed doors when you’re not around.


And you need to do this now not at the end of this exercise because it wrecks the process. If you want to see changes do this task. Pause the episode and ask yourself this question.


What would people say about you? Whatever comes naturally. Put that piece of paper to the side.

 

(00:24:03 – Removing the masks and coming clean to your self sabotaging habits)
2. Coming Clean

What you want to do now is identify your sabotaging traits and limiting beliefs. For some people, this is going to be freaky. Well, that’s why you have a bit of bourbon.


What I’m going to do is ask you to remove the mask. Most people wear their masks to show the world how they want to be seen, but you are who you are and these masks are your anchors holding you back. You can’t live a life trying to be someone else – just think about what I am telling you. How can you blossom into the most magnificent version of yourself if you are more interested in being someone else?


Self sabotaging habits: See which ones resonate with you, remove the masks – come clean -write a list as I go through these…


1. Priorities what do you focus on every day if you’re in business – making money, keeping yourself busy thinking you are focused on the cash and growing your business. Activities that take you closer to your goals, or further away from them. For example, selling, joint ventures, getting leads, making cold calls or watching tv, doing exercise, holidays, relaxing, socialising, hobbies.

2. Clarity – do you know what you really want or are you foggy? If you are unclear about where you want to go, how can you get there?


3. Level of Commitment How badly do you want this? How committed are you really to achieving your goal? Do you know what you are prepared to sacrifice? Or are you so focused on what you are not prepared to do?


4. Trying to save money to get rich – Saving money doesn’t make you rich. That is not enough. You have to learn to grow your money and get your money working for you. Are you prepared to stand on the shoulders of mentors, learn the necessary skills you need to get you where you want to go, or are you too clever and think that you do this by yourself – the same story you have been telling yourself for 10 years and are still so far behind you think you are coming first – this is a killer. It’s a mindset of peasant, an unsuccessful mindset. The greatest people of all time – across anything all have mentors but you think you can do this alone – madness.


5. Action. Theory can’t make you rich – you need to take action – you need to transact to make money. How many transactions are you making each day? You need to make a change in an engine that’s burring out. What are you doing each day? How many are you committed to making each day. We are all so gifted at telling ourselves and others why we didn’t get results or do something. And we defend our position but really what does this do to your personal brand – people can’t rely on you, useless, can’t get results, dropkick, insecure, fearful no spine, unmotivated, etc – this is the truth behind closed doors – the consequence for wearing your mask people eventually see you for who you really are.


6. Personal Growth – People who reject this the most need the most help. There’s a bigger person inside of you waiting to do bigger this. Embrace this or reject it – think you have it all worked out and no one can teach you anything – this is a big ego that overpowers the brain. Don’t fight change and expansion as it pulls you from your comfort zone.

 

(00:31:05 Common Self sabotaging habits)

The underlying rod for everything is fear. And fear comes out it hundreds of different masks.


1. Fear of …

– Selling
– Speaking to people
– Rejection
– Criticism
– Success – Yes some people have a fear of success
– Looking like a fool
– Looking like a fool
-What people think of you
– Confrontation



Now I don’t mean a bar fight. I’m talking about if your suppliers let you down. Do you pick up the phone and demands that something gets because it’s your reputation suffering or do you let your suppliers and clients steamroll you.


2. Can’t make a decision

3. You procrastinate

4. You’re unmotivated

5. You’re disorganised

6. No stickability – You start one thing then it gets a bit hard and you hide.

7. Are you unfocussed?

8. Do you have issues with rich successful people?

Now, this is a very common thing. I didn’t have rich parents, but we didn’t grow up poor. But there was a whole load of stuff around about rich people being evil. Just rubbish. It’s morons telling you this stuff when you’re a kid. So you believe this stuff and it affects you in business. Because you think if I do make it in business and become successful, I’m going to be evil.


9. Do you treat others with little respect?

10. Are you trustworthy and have credibility?

11. Are you reliable and punctual or do you make excuses and stories?

12. Are you aligned with your message?

13. What’s your level of attractiveness?


Now I don’t make the rules about this. But if you get out of bed, don’t comb your hair, brush your teeth, iron your shirt. Your shoes are broken and held together by tape. If you don’t make a positive professional appearance, even if you’re casually dressed, you have to have a level of pride in the way you look and your personal grooming. You want to be taken seriously.


14. Do you get results or someone who can’t get things done?

15. Can you influence people

16. Do you have low self-esteem and self-belief?


This is a serious one because a lot of people have this. If you’re trying to sell a product or service that’s worth $180 but you have such low self-esteem and you don’t think people will buy it, so you charge $25 bucks.


17. Are you astute or blasé?

18. You can’t say no

19. Are you a perfectionist?


You need to have standards and do things satisfactory sure, but trying to reach perfection it’s never going to happen. Perfection drives you mad in the head.


H – We see this in business owners all the time. We see this in a lot of business owners it has to be perfect before they release something. The colour is not right. The font isn’t right. You’re ready! Just go. How will you ever know your product or service is going to work? You will never have that thing perfect. How will you know until you get out into the market?


L – The underlying issue is fear of criticism. It’s all in your head. Different from setting standards and levels but you can never reach perfection. Ever.


20. You always have to be right.


I see many big business owners still struggling to get this right. And they wonder why their team culture sucks. Because the business owner stands his ground and he’s never wrong.


21. What’s your relationship with money?

Ma

ybe you don’t believe you deserve it. You’re scared of asking for it. You set too low of price because of your self-esteem.


Or I can’t earn money unless I’m a slave and I kill myself to earn it. It’s a massive anchor that many people have.


22. Are you a victim of circumstance?


Nothing is ever your fault. You’re always blaming someone else.


Now circle your top 3 biggest, most obvious self sabotaging habits and limiting beliefs. Or maybe I’ve prompted some that I haven’t read out.


Now that you’ve done this I want you to do the 1st Step – facing the mirror again. How do you think the world really sees you? What are people really saying about you behind closed doors? It might be confronting for some and not for others. But if you’re ever going to improve this is what you need to do.


H – You have to be honest with yourself. If you’re open and honest with yourself then you can change. If you’re not then you are still going to be stuck in the same rut.

 

(00:42:16 – The NEW best version of yourself)
3. Your new best version of your personal brand

The first task we did was how we thought the world saw you. The second one was coming clean and facing who you are. Now, who do you want to be? You want to create the new the best version of yourself – your new personal brand version. Take all these anchors off you and move forward.


Write down your best new version of yourself. With all your problems removed. And this should reduce your moron scale reading.


H – We do this exercise with a lot of business owners and it’s a big eye-opener for a lot of people. About how they are stopping themselves, not from just being a better person but a better business owner. And how those personality traits are messing up their business and personal growth.


L – The entire philosophy of this podcast is the 3 Fs. Financial freedom without all the Ferraris and helicopters. Time freedom so you can enjoy your life while building a business. Finally, Mind freedom, and mind freedom means understanding your problems in life. No one is perfect. Everyone makes mistakes and that’s ok. But if you are still making the same mistakes 15 years later then you’re a moron. You haven’t evolved.


And I say this compassionately, if you haven’t evolved you can’t have peace of mind. Every single one of us has problems in our lives and we must learn to address them. You should always try and be the best version of yourself for your friends, family, customers staff and business because that then allows you to have peace of mind.



H – That was a big one. But hopefully, this episode has opened your eyes to some of your traits that you haven’t noticed before. To now be able to have the confidence to take accountability for change.


I would love to hear from anybody that is willing to share their self-sabotaging traits. You might be surprised that a lot of other people are going through the same thing. What are some of the biggest personal obstacles you’ve overcome as a business owner? Just search for @bbqbourbonbusiness on both Facebook and Instagram and we’ll pop up a post that you can comment on.


Thank you for joining us everyone. Hopefully, you’ve had an eye-opening experience.


In the next episode, we are going to continue looking deeper into the seven steps of building a smart business engine and turning your business into a valuable asset.


The next episode is titled Mining fool’s gold. You want to tell us a little bit about that Luke.


L – We are continuing with the seven steps. If this is your first episode, we are working through the steps of how you can build a smart business engine and how do you implement these steps into your business to achieve a particular outcome. Which is getting your business to work for you. Giving you more time and turning it into a valuable asset.


Step 2 in this process is what I call mining fool’s gold. It’s all about optimising your Niche.


Most Business owners think well I’ve been in business for fifteen years this is for armatures. Not it’s not. If you’ve been struggling in business five, ten, 15 years in your business and things aren’t right chances are you are not in a lucrative niche.


Markets change, competitors become more aggressive, customers buying habits change. Particularly in today’s world with technology roaring ahead where no one can keep up.


So niches and trends are shifting and you still have a carbon copy printing going and using a Kodak camera. If your business is struggling maybe your trying to find gold in a led mine.


The next episode is about optimising your niche. It doesn’t matter if you’re new or you’ve been in business for a while and maybe your business was doing well at one stage and now it’s not or you’re struggling to get traction. The first place to look at is your niche. You want to find who buys from you the quickest and easiest. Not everyone is your customer. Are you just wasting your time?


H- It’s the same for most business owners, who have been running for a long time get precious about who they think their customers are and what products they offer. But like you said things change. If you’re not selling we need to look at who you’re selling to first before we even look at what your selling.


H – If you want to see up live and our friendly face, Luke has a new bourbon hat on, hop on to our YouTube Channel “BBQ Bourbon & Business Podcast Show” to check us out.


If you enjoyed this episode don’t forget to leave us a review, we would really appreciate it. And to make sure you don’t miss any new episodes don’t forget to subscribe to apple podcasts, google podcasts, spotify or wherever you prefer to listen to your podcasts.


Cheers everyone.


*KACHING*

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